[ she didnât think that tim would judge her, but she still likes that he doesnât. his approval matters. ]
It does feel rather illicit, doesnât it. History would think me wretched for partaking in it, though a kingâs second wife is rarely well-regarded, in the first place.
Since he left? He hasn't. But I've been seeing other people too. I'm not worried about that so much as the future. What happens when I drop everything else for him and he finds a reason to leave again in a few months? I'll be alone, again.
I think it wise to protect yourself, in the first instance, even if that means entertaining multiple entanglements where you would otherwise prefer an exclusive relationship.
I'd prefer it, and so would he. At least, he'd prefer if I weren't seeing anyone else. But I could meet someone here that I can actually depend on. I have a date tomorrow from the butler game, what if that could really be something? I should explore it, instead of cut it off at the knees for Hawk's sake.
I love him, but I don't trust him. How dysfunctional is that?
[ Her approval feels surprisingly nice. It's not the sort of thing he's ever thought to seek out, since back with his own family, he wouldn't dare to even come out to them, much less introduce them to a man of his. The answer would, of course, be a devastating no. ]
I could want for no finer knight than you, Ser Laughlin. Though I did enquire. It seems heâs sworn to another queen.
[ always worth checking these things. ]
I found a wretched little beast. It has the appearance of a mouse crossed with a bat. And it breathes fire. A jape regarding my late husbandâs House, Iâm sure.
When Aemond was a boy, he snuck into the dragonpit regularly, despite the dangers. I shudder to think on how often he was returned to me by the kingsguard, singed and more pleased for it.
He claimed the largest living dragon when he was only ten. His fondness for the beasts is beyond me.
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It does feel rather illicit, doesnât it. History would think me wretched for partaking in it, though a kingâs second wife is rarely well-regarded, in the first place.
Will you welcome him back?
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I don't know yet. If I do, it'll be different from before.
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Or a bawdy song, perhaps.
[ write your novel now tim ]
Invariably so. Do you know if he has been faithful to you, or if he desires to be?
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Since he left? He hasn't. But I've been seeing other people too. I'm not worried about that so much as the future. What happens when I drop everything else for him and he finds a reason to leave again in a few months? I'll be alone, again.
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Trust must be earned.
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I love him, but I don't trust him. How dysfunctional is that?
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[ her children... her father... rhaenyra... ]
All that aside, are you excited for your date?
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I do not understand all he says, but he's very kind. He helped me manage the creature I found in the scavenger hunt.
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Ser Harry? Are you collecting other knights? đŽ
Your creature?
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Though I did enquire. It seems heâs sworn to another queen.
[ always worth checking these things. ]
I found a wretched little beast. It has the appearance of a mouse crossed with a bat.
And it breathes fire. A jape regarding my late husbandâs House, Iâm sure.
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Are you keeping a fire breathing rodent in your rooms?
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[ as for the rodent â ]
I suppose I am. It followed me when I attempted to leave it where I found it and only appears at peace in my company.
[ SIGHING. ]
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Are you considering it a pet or a pest?
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He claimed the largest living dragon when he was only ten. His fondness for the beasts is beyond me.
I imagine he views Spitfyre similarly.
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[ âalmost sweetâ ]
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He assumed we were lovers.
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I fear he has surmised why my queensguard has always taken such a keen interest in him â and now applies that learning to all my companions.
[ confessional time: she did fuck at least one knight. ]
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Sounds like a scandal.
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[ translation: she waited until he died. ser criston just simped until then. ]
Thank you for tolerating his questions, regardless.
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